a poem...

After a while – Veronica A. Shoffstall

After a while you learn
the subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn
that love doesn’t mean leaning
and company doesn’t always mean security.
And you begin to learn
that kisses aren’t contracts
and presents aren’t promises
and you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of woman, not the grief of a child
and you learn
to build all your roads on today
because tomorrow’s ground is
too uncertain for plans
and futures have a way of falling down
in mid-flight.
After a while you learn
that even sunshine burns
if you get too much
so you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone
to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
you really are strong
you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn
with every goodbye, you learn…

I have a confession, I collect poems. Every so often I read poems online, all different kinds. My favorite poet is Sara Teasdale, she's kinda melancholy (ok that's a lie, she super melancholy) but i like her insight and her diction. obviously, this isn't by her, but i like this poem a lot. I says a lot...on a lot of different levels. What kind of experience does it take to make someone write these words. How many sad experiences did this person have to make them feel like they must set out by themselves? It's intresting though, because, slowly, I'm starting to become this person. Scary, huh? Its scary to learn sometimes. Its scary to know that i must to learn if i want to actually live a life instead of just existing in one. Its scary that if i want to learn i will experience pain.

and on a lighter note, the U of M vs. OSU game is tomorrow.....Go wolverines. If all goes according to plan, tomorrow will consist of sleeping in, watching the U of M game, watching the HU basketball game, and helping at a benefit for an amazing little girl. should be a good day.

side note. my roommates are discussing a very serious matter. after watching an episode of Deadliest Catch (awesome show by the way), we have begun to ponder this question: What does a lobster do all day long? and how do they stay on the bottom of the ocean? we may never know.

thought of the moment: take away the smoking, swearing, heavy drinking from the average deck hand on Deadliest Catch, add some teeth, some religious beliefs, and at least a GED level of education, and you have my perfect man.